There are times I just want to be left alone: just to come home from my daily life duties shift and fall to my bed and sleep. There are times where I do not want to be bothered with Facebook, e-mail, text messages, phone calls, Skype calls, FaceTime calls or conversation(s) period. All I am seeking is some quiet rest. However…
it seems that it is on those days that all I am seeking is some alone time that Lawrence is seeking my company the most. It’s on those days something really exciting happened for him that he wants to share. Or, something not so good happen and he wants to dialogue about. Or, it is him just seeking to spend time with me and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk: on the time that I was desiring to spend to myself and with myself – alone.
It seems weird right? To go from spending over three months apart, constantly talking about how we cannot wait to see each other and be with each other and so forth, watching the countdown going from 100+ days to nothing, to coming home to being sweep off my feet into his loving embrace, to spending every possible moment together as Christianly possible, only to have a moment where you just wished they would leave you alone – but for a moment?
As much as I would love to ask him to give me “my” moment, I do not. I do not because I see a need in him.
A yearning to find his quiet and relaxing moments with me. A yearning to enjoy my company, hear my thoughts, and hear some words of encouragement from his love. A yearning to drop all the guards and caution he built up during the day to just be real and open and vulnerable and unashamed in this solitude time with me. A yearning to unwind from his daily life duties shift with me. He could have went to anyone –friends, family – or anything – piano, t.v. – for his quiet time. Yet, he came to me. So no, I do not turn him away.