Three Cord Strong not easily broken.” A saying that Christians use almost as a “goodluck charm” that will prevent divorce, seperation, and/or breakup of their relationship. They’ll say
What if I told you that this is not the case?
A cord of three strands is not easily broken.
Some translations will use the classifier “quickly” instead of “easily.” The classifier is the conditional term that means that the alternative is true. Meaning, if “a cord of three strands is not easily broken” then the alternative is true: “a three cord of three strands can be broken.”
How? Is Christ not enough? Absolutely He is!
The question is am I enough? Is my spouse enough? Is my marriage enough?
Is my friend/sibling/parent/etc. enough?
We determine the answer to this by
How we speak to our spouse/friends/family can act like the knife that severs the cord or as a 1Kevlar® or 2Spectra® that reinforces the strength of the cord. Listen:
“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” —Colossians 4:6
Even in the times of disagreement(s) your words can be a powerful influencer for good.
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” – Proverbs 15:1
Way before we got married and we were just dating, Lawrence and I agreed on the fact that there are certain words – under no circumstances – are allowed to be said in our conversation to each other. For example, we do not use curse words, derogatory words or simple “innocent” words like “stupid” or “idiot” to each other.
I love Lawrence a lot and so I am intentional about how I speak to him and the tone I use when speaking. I try to enourage and uplift him in his endeavors. Of course, “try” is the classifier so the opposite is (sometimes) true. There are times I have my “miss independent” moments and I fail miserably to use uplifting words.
More then words, our actions holds significant amount of weight on the success of a relationship. Actions can build up trustworthiness, faithfulness and intamcy. It can also build up walls, distrust and animosity. Use your actions
- to show love by lending a helping hand to your love one
- by keeping your words and doing what you said you will do when you said you’ll do it
- letting them know how much you love them or that you’re thinking of them
- by being accountable to your promises
- by protecting your relationship
Unvoiced expections and comparison are the #1 killer of any relationships.
- looking at the “Joneses” and wanting what they have can blindside you to the blessings you have in your relationships. Of course, its great to aspire and achieve to have or be better than what you have or are today. However, just remember this:
The grass is not greener on the other side.
Do not believe everything you “see:”
“Everything that glitters is not gold”
For us, there is a specific couple that we really admire and look up too. However, Lawrence and I look pass the social media postings/likes/followers and watch the behavior/mannerism of the couple in real life. If there is something that we like, we discuss to see if its something that will work for our relationship. If it works, great. If not, we move on.
No one is a mind reader and you cannot expect your love one to know what you expected of them in any given situation.
Always, always, voice your expectations/wants/desires and coversate togethere
Its the quickest and most simpliest way to keep your relationship strong.
Also, be open to the fact that it cannot always be met.
A three cord strong is not easily broken by
- Doing whatever it takes to strengthen, uplift and nuture the relationship
- Connecting yourselves with Christ.
- Binding all these together.
- Using your words, actions and desires as a Kevler or Spectra to reinforcing the bond
1:Strong, light fiber made by DuPont used in bulletproof vests. Used in climbing cord for its high tensile strength and resistance to cutting.
2:The strongest fiber ever produced, it is 10 times stronger than steel by weight and twice as strong as Kevlar®