“Whosoever findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.”
Myself, Nathalie, or Nathalie and I are constantly asked by others
How do you guys do it? How do you guys spend so much time apart and still be so “in love?”
“You guys are in inspiration. Me? I can never do a long distance relationship!”
Let me start off with this disclaimer before I answer how:
I hate it. Nathalie hates it. We hate abhor it!
It being the long distance of course! We would definitely never make that option our first, middle or last choice!
However, we find ourself in a situation where that’s the reality of our lives right now. Well, has been our situation for the past three years span of dating, engagement and now marriage.
Even so, I love my wife and fall for her more and more and more each day.
How is that possible given that we live miles apart from one another?
Let me you!
Keeping in touch is much more then just speaking to each other on a daily basis.
Its really easy to live two seperate lives while apart: especially when you’re an ocean apart! Nathalie and I, we remove the “long distance” part and act like we are in a long distance relationship. I know Nathalie’s schedule and she knows mine. We keep each other inform of schedule changes, the good, bad, ugly of our day and we manage our finances as we would normally do if we were still face-to-face.
We text, we flirt, we joke around and keep each other laughing as if nothing changed.
One of the popular “games” is to alternate who calls whom. Meaning, if I call my wife one day then the next, its her turn to call.
We don’t do that. We call whenever we want. If I miss her, I call. When she misses me, she calls. It doesn’t matter if we just have a simple question to ask, we call. Always, we are reaching out to each other without “keeping track” of who called or reached out more or whatever.
Our only focus is staying connected.
We talked about the importance of being independent while yet dependent within a relationship.
This concept is even more so important in a long distance situation as your partner might not always be there fore you when you need/want them to be. This could be due to time differences, physical barrier and/or change of plans. There are days Nathalie and I will make plans to spend time together and she’ll come home tired from work and just want to go to sleep or really needs to study, or I’ll spend a longer time out then anticipated.
So, you have to have hobbies. You have to be comfortable spending time by yourself. You have to be flexible and give each other the space needed at that moment in order for this to work.
With texting and WhatsApp and Snapchat and Facetime and Skype and whatever else (!) you’d think that love letters are “old fashion” or “thing of the past.”
However, its one of the sweetest things that we do for each other. Nathalie writes really sweet and long love letters while mines are more short and sweet ;). We will randomly hand write them and deliver them so we never know when we’ll receive one.
Its great for the upcoming days when our computer and phones will fail us.
We’ll have those physical copies to look back on 🙂
Prayer is what really keeps us!
We pray a lot together and seperately. That’s when we really see each others heart and apprehensions and love.
Nathalie: I really love hearing Lawrence pray for me. He doesn’t share his feelings to often but when he prays! Man, it melts my heart because I can feel his love towards me.
Ok, back to my husband 🙂
Lawrence: Yes, what my wife said 🙂
I love my wife and fall for her everyday. Being in a long distance relation has taught us a few things.
We keep our relationship strong by
- keeping in touch
- not playing games
- being independent yet dependent of each other
- writting love letters
- prayer together for each other.
Nathalie: In what ways do you keep your relationship strong amidst the distance? We would love to read your story below!